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	<title>humancipate!  Connect, Live Free . . . Be! &#187; Connectedness</title>
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		<title>Crowded Isolation</title>
		<link>http://humancipate.com/crowded-isolation/</link>
		<comments>http://humancipate.com/crowded-isolation/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Mon, 27 Apr 2009 12:00:00 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Geuka</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Life Lessons]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Relationships]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Tech Therapy]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Connectedness]]></category>

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		<description><![CDATA[Picture this scene . . . You’re at a table in a crowded coffee shop with your laptop and an over-priced drink.  You’re watching some ridiculous vids on YouTube, updating your Facebook status and sketching out your latest blog post, while remembering that you actually came here to work!  You briefly look up and notice that all the tables are full.  Everyone else is just as engrossed in their computer related activity as you just were.  And then you think to yourself, why am I here?  Didn’t I decide to leave the house and work in a public place, so I could be amongst people?


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			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>Picture this scene . . . You’re at a table in a crowded coffee shop with your laptop and an over-priced drink.&#160; You’re watching some ridiculous vids on YouTube, updating your Facebook status and sketching out your latest blog post, while remembering that you actually came here to work!&#160; You briefly look up and notice that all the tables are full.&#160; Everyone else is just as engrossed in their computer related activity as you just were.&#160; And then you think to yourself, why am I here?&#160; Didn’t I decide to leave the house and work in a public place, so I could be amongst people?</p>
<h6><img src="http://humancipate.com/wp-content/uploads/2009/04/crowdedisolation.jpg" /> <a href="http://www.flickr.com/photos/raaphorst/3231240180/sizes/l/" target="_blank">[Photo Credit]</a></h6>
<p><strong><em>Yes,</em></strong> you did!&#160; You <em>did</em> come here to be amongst people; maybe to interact or meet someone new.&#160; But sure enough, you and all the folks around you are isolated in these computer bubbles.&#160; You’re an arms length from each other but might as well be miles away.&#160; What gives?</p>
<p>Recently I was on vacation, visiting family.&#160; My sister and I decided to take our laptops and work at the local Bread Company.&#160; Upon arrival, we spent the first couple of minutes deciding where to sit.&#160; It wasn’t very crowded so we had our pick of several seating areas.&#160; After choosing our seats, we setup shop and each entered our respective computer bubbles.</p>
<p>As time went on and it crept closer to the lunch hour, the place got more and more crowded.&#160; I really love observing people and enjoyed watching as several trickled into our section.&#160; It was kind of interesting.&#160; I looked up as each person came in, but none noticed my gaze.&#160; Each was focused on a single mission . . . finding a table that was near an electrical outlet.&#160; It’s funny to see people walking around, looking under tables as if they had lost something . . . contorting their bodies to make sure they’d examined every inch of wall space in search of that powerful prize.&#160; Since I wasn’t a three prong receptacle, I was invisible to them!</p>
<p>Some found electrical outlets, others didn’t.&#160; But all entered their individual computer bubbles nonetheless.&#160; All but one.&#160; </p>
<p>&#160;</p>
<h2>The Quest for Connectedness…</h2>
<p>I observed this one gentleman.&#160; He entered the section where we were sitting and selected a table that others had ignored.&#160; You see, this table wasn’t any where near a source of electricity, plus it had an interesting wobble (he spent a few minutes placing something under one of the legs to level it).&#160; This guy was the only person in the whole place (other than the employees) without a laptop.&#160; </p>
<p>He had a book or a notepad or something and started doing the work he came there to do.&#160; Occasionally I noticed a puzzled look on his face, but wasn’t really sure why.&#160; After a while, my sister and I broke free of our bubbles to converse briefly . . . I then understood his look.&#160; He seemed to be immediately inspired by our dialogue.&#160; Just so you understand, I don’t think he took notice because we were discussing something particularly interesting, but rather because we were actually <em>talking</em> to one another.&#160; So after a minute or so he and my sister made eye contact and he could no longer hold back his enthusiasm.&#160; He blurted out something like “<em>Can you believe everyone’s got one of these things?!</em>”, and the conversation began.</p>
<p>He of course was referring to all the laptops.&#160; He was a journalist &amp; college professor and had relied on the use of a computer since the 80s.&#160; Though he was a long time computer user, he was convinced that this age of technology proliferation was injecting a certain amount of isolation in our lives.&#160; He remarked on how the early days of personal computing were focused on utility and efficiency.&#160; Now computers &amp; cell phones are reflections of personal identity like one’s clothing or hair style.&#160; Like the commercial says, are you a Mac or PC?</p>
<p>So, I could certainly see where he was coming from.&#160; However, I think technology also provides the means to connect with those we wouldn’t otherwise have access to.&#160; For example, I recently found a friend on Facebook that I hadn’t communicated with in over 20 years and he currently lives in Alaska.&#160; Odds are pretty good that we weren’t going to run into each other.</p>
<p>But there was no denying the merit of his words and our human techno-cocoon<img id="nostyle" title="This is the icon that indicates that I or someone like me has made up this word!  :)" alt="" src="http://humancipate.com/wp-content/uploads/2008/12/wordhelper.gif" /> filled setting was proof enough.&#160; As my sister and I continued our conversation with this gentleman, touching on subjects like globalization, ethnicity, technology, teaching, journalism and African dance, we started feeling a change.&#160; After a few minutes we felt the eyes of people peering out from their bubbles and taking notice of our interaction.&#160; It seemed that somehow, if only slightly, each of the bubble bound inhabitants of our section noticed the paradox of the setting and got in touch with their own desire for connectedness.&#160; </p>
<p>My sister rotated to another table and started interacting with some other folks.&#160; The dense peace was officially disturbed and a few real world conversations were now going strong.&#160; We had to depart shortly thereafter, so I’m not sure if the good times kept rollin’, but it reminded me of the importance of connecting with people and the value of deep relationships.</p>
<p>The truth, is that we <strong>all</strong> desire that connectedness.&#160; It is the essence of who we are.</p>
<blockquote><p><img style="border-top-width: 0px; border-left-width: 0px; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-right-width: 0px" height="100" alt="Napoleon Hill" src="http://humancipate.com/wp-content/uploads/2009/04/erichfromm.jpg" width="96" align="left" border="0" /> &quot;Our deepest human need is the need to overcome our separateness, to leave the prison of our aloneness.&quot;</p>
<p><span>- <strong>Erich Fromm</strong>         <br /><em>Social Psychologist and Humanistic Philosopher</em></span></p>
</blockquote>


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